Thread where I disrespect every flag of every country one by one The US flag: god it's shite [1/195]

Thread where I disrespect every flag of every country one by one The US flag: god it's shite [1/195]

United Kingdom: What is this why are the red diagonals not even aligned [2/195]

wtf you didn't even try, just 3 colours what are you an ice cream [3/195]

ok what is this, this is just the last one but turned around, we've all heard of the "rotate left" function in paint not impressed [4/195]

ok italy this is just france but you know what the "fill" button is [5/195]

Germany: an assault on the eyes, colours don't work, 1 star [6/195]

Chad, you are a mouldy France, plus we all know a douchebag called Chad [7/195]

Mongolia: i find your lack of symmetry disturbing, the blue is not my preferred shade and wtf is that yellow entertainment unit [8/195]

Sweden: blue and yellow = the colours of sadness and cowardice [9/195]

Ukraine: see Sweden [10/195]

(I'll make sure to label every country so it doubles as an educational tool to learn all the flags) go suck a dick Switzerland [11/195]

a shield ain't gonna protect you from what I'm going to say Slovakia you're ugly [12/195]

goes for you too Slovenia oh boy your shield is tiny compared to Slovakia you got so pwned [13/195]

Latvia: unoriginal, uninspiring, 3/10 [14/195]

actually have to admit Swaziland flag is cool, NFL players would struggle to take a knee, esp as it looks like an actual football [15/195]

ok Sri Lanka is p badass, it's a lion with a SWORD, a lion is already a powerful animal in the wild and they gave it a SWORD [16/195]

the Brunei one is fab it's hands make it look like it's doing a "what the hell" gesture which is a good attitude to have [17/195]

I'm a big fan of Kiribati really impressed with how were able to capture the bird at that exact moment [18/195]

you know what I came in with a negative attitude but I'm discovering loads of flags I've never seen before. Malawi ain't half bad [19/195]

fuckin hell Mozambique has an actual rifle in it, but also a book? I admire their balanced view on life, maybe we do need both? [20/195]

Ecuador has astonishing detail. Eagle, mountain, boat, river. If you magnify 1,000x there is actually another flag on the boat [21/195]

Cambodia have put in a whole palace but also a yet to be painted one. Mixed feelings, some good bits, 3 stars [22/195]

I just realised I have to go do an audition and haven't learnt the lines so finish this when I get back PS Belgium get a grip [23/195]

also ppl have been saying I've gone soft but I am a reasonable man, I will give credit where credit is due like grow up Denmark [24/195]

wtf Ivory Coast you are just backwards Ireland and I dread to think what that looks like [25/195]

Guys I have an audition in an hour, should I sack it off, all I want to do is do the last 170 countries? ps Botswana, learn art [26/195]

Accompanying poll: should I skip the audition?

so far 24 have voted and 75% think I should skip my audition, my agent will be FURIOUS Congo one diagonal isn't cool [27/195]

I should go but I cant reject the will of the people Colombia, you're top heavy, we've all tried to divide by hand, get a ruler [28/195]

I don't care about my career anymore Bahamas it look likes the start of a solar eclipse by a triangular moon [29/195]

I only care about #FlagDisrespect2017 Costa Rica it looks like you've zoomed in on the diagonal of the UK flag [30/195]

I did the audition in the end, I only had one line and my instincts kicked in and I went "Austria, your flag sucks" [31/195]

Then I flipped them all the bird on my way out Antigua and Barbuda looks like a woman looking at the sunset through her open legs [32/195]

In my mind all the casting agents were replaced by the Gabon flag and I respected them so little due to their lack of imagination [33/195]

I actually hated being away from this, my real passion, for even an hour Cameroon that star ain't fooling nobody, you're boring [34/195]

But I have more commitments so I need extra help Central African Republic that red bow cutting through the middle is an eyesore [35/195]

So I'm looking to hire an intern to take over while I'm busy please send me your CV and relevant skills Estonia i'm asleep [36/195]

This project is bigger than me. I have a wife and kids to feed. Djibouti gone nuts on the "shapes" function in Word [37/195]

Requirements for intern job: -a pass in geography GCSE -can mock flags without being racist -DBS check Benin? Benign more like [38/195]

a reminder that the internship is UNPAID someone only learned the primary colours, Armenia [39/195]

forgot to attach China here it is [40/195]

Ken Cheng@kenchengcomedy · Sep 25, 2017

Also looking for someone to track which flags I've already done China's subliminal message to give it 5 stars earns it 0 STARS [40/195]

Democratic Republic of Congo nice unsubtle attempt to upstage Republic of Congo, really petty if anything [41/195]

ok hired my intern his name is Humbert Wendell and he nailed the interview with this "Luxembourg...just be yourself"

fuckin awkward when Peru and Austria turn up at the same party, one of them needs to change [43/195]

Don't even get me started on all the flags with the Union Jack in the corner, like some serious daddy issues there Australia [44/195]

New Zealand you get annoyed when people mistake you for Australia but you really aren't doing yourself any favours here [45/195]

And no it doesn't make up for it if you get a 5 year old to do a drawing of a lion Fiji [46/195]

Tuvalu seriously forget who your daddy is, be your own country I bet your favourite film is "Flags of our Fathers" [47/195]

hey guys it's Humbert Wendell taking over, Ken took a break to play Mario Kart Georgia, you're obsessed with St George [48/195]

Norway more like no way I respect this flag ha ha -Humbert [49/195]

Oman more like Oh man this sucks, why is there a symbol in the corner which looks like some S&M gear -Humbert [50/195]

Ken said I shouldn't do so many bad puns, but he will Nauru (now rue) the day he tells Humbert what to do PS whats going on here [51/195]

These zigzags suck ass but almost as much as the fact I'm not being paid for this internship -Humbert [52/195]

Ken also said I wasn't allowed to bring my politics into it but fuck it the Monaco flag is secretly a listening device -Humbert [53/195]

In fact govts coat all flags in pheromones to ensure loyalty/nationalism why else would people like this BS Guyana one -Humbert [54/195]

pls buy my book Humbert Wendell's Theories of Why Flags Are Bad, it has a chapter on how Japan's flag makes ppl become snipers -H [55/195]

Saint Lucia's flag was trying to inspire its people to build The Great Pyramids of St Lucia but it failed and was covered up -H [56/195]

Cape Verde's flag is a red line through what looks like an old EU flag, that's why so many Cape Verdeans voted Leave -Humbert [57/195]

Humbert Wendell will no longer be tweeting from this account due to creative disagreements. Laos this is crap [58/195]

Due to recent events I've had to set up my own Kickstarter to get this project finished also Morocco pull your finger out [59/195]

now waiting on Kickstarter approval, started getting some abuse this guy is worse than the Federated States of Micronesia flag [60/195]

I can't finish this today, so I will be back tomorrow for more. Cyprus looks like a coffee stain that looks like Cyprus [61/195]

I feel like George RR Martin where his books take longer and longer to come out Brazil, like in Charades, using words is cheating [62/195]

Good morning everyone! Saudi Arabia looks like one of those cryptic brain teasers for "the pen is mightier than the sword" [63/165]

without Humbert this is getting too much I've had to make TWO excel spreadsheets to keep track Czech Republic, embarrassing... [64/165]

I only wish Somalia would put in this much effort, this is 4x lazier than Micronesia wow [65/165]

even got outshone by Honduras which is still crap, a child could've done this [66/195]

Sorry for the delay I realised I need to know how to end this so I've been looking up plot structure diagrams Hungary BORING [67/175]

195*

I spent the last hour planning it all out - it's a big project Malta why is a horse crushing a weird turkey that's not war [68/195]

Kuwait you look like one of those optical illusions that demonstrate changing 3d perspectives. You could be a metal bar or a room [69/175]

Due to lengthy delays since last flag, I've had accusations that I am George RR Martin-ing this, here's my official response [70/195]

Also have had calls for Nepal, don't worry,got something special planned. Dominica could've picked any bird and chose a parrot [71/165]

Speaking of birds, Albania must've ordered a scary-ass mutated bird with 20 long nipples [72/195]

Like Serbia too wtf are these? Siamese birds? They don't exist [73/195]

wtf another one!!! the Montenegro bird has two heads but one crown so is trying to balance it on the back of their heads [74/195]

I for one welcome the new 280 character limit, could have got this done in 97.5 tweets instead Mexico's flag designer was def on acid [75/

some people are now applying to fill the intern role left by Humbert including @lulu_popplewell Myanmar colour your star in [76/195]

Please send in new applications! I have learned my lesson and am now paying my interns! Pakistan try harder [77/195]

However just got an e-mail saying my Kickstarter has not been approved therefore I have no funding and cannot hire an intern. Tomorrow I will be seeking real investors. Flag Disrespect 2017 is now a startup. Cya tomorrow. PS Panama it's not "stars and rectangles" [78/195]

Morning! Gone to "The Valley" today to woo investors for my new startup company, Flag Disrespect Ltd Ireland here's some real disrespect [79/195]

Haha just kidding here's the real flag

jokes again that was Côte d'Ivoire seriously though your flag looks like flavours of soup

Been asked "Ffs how many days are you gonna take to finish this". Look, this is too big to fuck up. Like the Marvel Cinematic Universe, I've planned it out till 2028. Speaking of Ireland, India you are just a rotation and then someone dropped their bike tire on it [80/195]

Today I am at a "start-up speed-dating event" where you have 3 mins to trick investors into giving you money Bosnia and Herzegovina this is low effort, the stars are even cut out at the top and bottom like it's part of a bigger flag [81/195]

I sat down with a v famous wealthy capitalist can't say his name but it rhymes with Hupert Wurdock. My opener was "Marshall Islands EWWWWW" he seemed impressed [82/195]

Okay people have seen through my riddle, yes it was none other than venture capitalist Cubert Schmurkok Rwanda, someone's been to the beach [83/195]

Cubert said the idea was great but he doesn't see where profit would come from and I can't just rely on investor money - I thought that was the whole point of a startup ffs Solomon Islands someone's been to the beach AT NIGHT [84/195]

OMG NAMIBIA WHY IS THE BEACH ON FIRE [85/195]

The next investor was none other than the Prince of Nigeria!!! He said he'd give me 65 million if I tweeted Nigeria had the best flag I took one look and couldn't do it, it's hideously dull [86/195]

I thought all hope was lost, but then I met this man named Dominick Seabrooke. He told me I could turn Flag Disrespect into an app where users can compare flags and say which is worse for example which is worse Romania or Chad? both equally shit [87/195]

I will call it....The Flagmash Like which is shitter Monaco or Indonesia? omg so tough this app is so fun I can see the $$$$ [88/195]

Dominick Seabrooke told me rather than "The Flagmash" that I should just call it "Flagmash", he said "drop the 'the', it's cleaner" also Gambia sux [89/195]

Dominick Seabrooke is really impressive, his new app is called "Tinder for Dogs" and he hopes that it will put traditional dog matchmaking stores out of business Burundi looks like it has warts [90/195]

He also advised me to set up a Patreon to fund this so here it is patreon.com/user?u=3122846 Omg Belize looks like it's the start of a porno, the guy on the right even has a bumpaddle [91/195]

We have just secured our first investor!!! We are being backed by a colorblind awareness campaign, "Blind to Colorblind", but we will try not to let our sponsors affect the tweets too much Bulgaria the red and green is ugly and makes it difficult for some [92/195]

Madagascar this red-green is worse because it also looks like you accidentally printed out a square image onto an A4 [93/195]

Bangladesh this is just a poor man's Japanese flag [94/195]

there are just so many red-green ones, if you are colourblind you are missing out on the Algeria flag missing out on how crap it is, that is [95/195]

Mali, Guinea, Lithuania, Senegal, sorry you are all too similar to deserve your own post, stop being those weird kids that just hang out with each other, get some new friends [96-99/175]

At least Bolivia did something exciting with that pattern although they missed an obvious trick by not having the emblem appear on each of the six individual Bolivian flags attached to the emblem [100/195]

the Dominican Republic emblem on the other hand looks great but it's so damn tiny i don't carry a pocket magnifying glass just to check flags [101/195]

Egypt's emblem though looks like a bird opening up its long golden trenchcoat to expose a three-pronged penis, please there are children around [102/195]

exactly guys it's so tiny

no i genuinely forgot to attach

Spain's emblem tho looks like a shield that's tied itself to the bedposts, the Spanish royal family was definitely into bondage [103/195]

oh Mauritius you used 4 stripes instead of the normal 3 you are so edgy and cool nobody likes a showoff [104/195]

the haters are coming out in full force, this one's a Dr. so she must be right also Portugal went way overboard with the only two rubber stamps they own, "little yellow castle" and "tiny blue shield" must have been on sale [105/195]

oh crap just discovered that there is a copycat @kenchangcomedy out there posing as me! you can tell this cheap knockoff by his many mistakes and crude captions. i will deal with this in the morning PS Comoros, someone gave some shape cutters to their preschooler [106/195]

please disregard @kenchangcomedy it is a cheap knock-off just like Liberia is a cheap knock-off of the US flag, 49 stars and 2 stripes missing [107/195]

currently in the process of trying to get verified but it's been denied! really can't tell if Kenya is a shield or an American football that's short of touchdown by like an inch (or some kind of potato with two knives) [108/195]

had people saying i'm insulting their country and national pride...guys real national pride is being secure enough in how you feel about your country to not care about a random joke tweet about your flag like Iceland is prob fine, but your flag is rank [109/195]

lol Angola you got a machete and a HALF gear wheel how you gonna build a country with that? at best you can make a quarter gear wheel but still unlikely [110/195]

Belarus the pixelation on the sidebar is killing me, it's not the 80s anymore we don't have Atari 8-bits, we have 4k HDTVs get some resolution [111/195]

Afghanistan this would be good but you aren't even flying the same flag in the emblem, back your own flag [112/195]

To my surprise, my audition on Monday has yielded some excellent results! Kazakhstan is like the first draft of a good flag. Ew looks like the colours were picked at random and the rest is unfinished [113/195]

Zimbabwe no idea how that bird's mouth made it to the final version, it looks like it was done on MS paint [114/195]

Uzbekistan mate you got carried away with those stars [115/195]

come on UAE you're giving me nothing to work with. just pure crap [116/195]

c'mon Vietnam if I wanted to see this crap I would've just zoomed in on the Chinese flag [117/195]

Moldova decided to dedicate its flag to the concept of not having enough hands to carry everything so you have to put the last item in your mouth [118/195]

sorry for the delay there are loads of boring flags left that I'm dreading to do Lebanon, all hail this bit of disgusting mould [119/195]

i've decided though to do all the crap ones in one go to get them over with, these won't be pretty Jordan: boring crap [120/195]

Guinea-Bissua: boring crap [121/195]

Ghana: boring crap [122/195]

Burkina Faso: boringa crapo [123/195]

It's okay I have a thesaurus Chile: tame poop [124/195]

Cuba: dull defecation [125/195]

Saint Kitts and Nevis: trite shite [126/195]

Iraq: مملة حماقة [127/195]

Greece Really Epitomises Exhausting Clichéd Excrement [128/195]

Here's a haiku for Maldives: Boring, dull and tame Uninteresting, mundane Crap crap crap crap crap [129/195]

Sierra Leone really??? It's like Hungary and Luxembourg decided to split the difference. You're such a new flag too (1961) it's like discovering a millennial named Ethel [130/195]

Paraguay if you need to put your own name on your flag it defeats the point of a flag [131/195]

Yeah Seychelles let's have the flag look like a normal flag except it's getting further and further away [132/195]

Zambia took a regular flag, made it smaller, rotated it and shoved it into the bottom right corner. And that flag sucks too [133/195]

jesus Uruguay it's the creepy face from my nightmares, now gonna see it whenever i close my eyes [134/195]

It's on Argentina too and I swear it's puckering up or at least doing some sort of duck face, imagine that staring at you outside your bedroom window. also it has like 20 weird legs, monstrosity [135/195]

wtf Philippines you can't see both the Sun and the stars at the same time, someone started drawing this flag in the day then finished it off at night [136/195]

Props to the flag of Macedonia for depicting the Sun going supernova leading to the sweet annihilation of the human race [137/195]

Andorra are your most prized possessions a kite, some racetracks and a cow about to land onto another identical cow? that sounds like a cool place [138/195]

St Vincent and Grenadines: someone's favourite card is the 3 of diamonds [139/195]

Ethiopia putting an excessive number of lines on your star doesn't make it not boring, this is lipstick on a pig [140/195]

Kyrgyzstan supposedly the symbol's meant to be a yurt but i've never seen a yurt like that, it looks more like a double rainbow but they're crossing each other which is impossible especially on the ACTUAL SUN [141/195]

Apologies for the slowness of flags I have spent most of my time trying to get Flagmash off the ground. Pleased to provide a sneak peak of our prototype Sao Tome and Principe vs South Africa [142 and 143/195]

Giving you the chance to trial it via Twitter poll. Which flag is worse? Click to choose.

Palau yes we've all seen the sky before, get an imagination [144/195]

c'mon Niger it's too late in the game for another shitty Ireland rotation. Doesn't help that you've put a big orange in the middle [145/195]

we get it Liechtenstein you're a fan of the Netflix series The Crown. I like Breaking Bad but I wouldn't put a big chunk of crystal meth on my flag (actually I would) [146/195]

Croatia errrr it's an oven mitt [148/195]

bring it on North Korea [149/195]

I missed out 147 by accident so here is 147 Qatar why don't you just go marry Bahrain [147/195]

Tajikistan's crown looks like the top of a coffee presser, fun history fact this is because the King used to riff on this all the time and be like "I'm under presser" and "I'm oppressing my people" [150/195]

Eritrea looks like the front cover of a forest fire prevention pamphlet, might as well stick Smokey Bear on there [151/195]

again apologies for the slowness, things are going well with Flagmash, my wife loves me at the moment, and I've also been approached to turn Flag Disrespect into a TV series! Just typed up the script for the first episode, Togo [152/195]

I sent the script in but the goddamn studios are meddling. They want it to be more action-oriented to get viewers in! I made some subtle adjustments to the next episode, Timor L'este, but I feel it's maintained the spirit of my original vision [153/195]

Wow Tonga I wonder how many buildings in your country tricked people into thinking they were hospitals. Also that is a lot of wasted space [154/195]

Libya your current flag is even less interesting than your last flag, and that was just one colour (attached for comparison) [155/195]

Singapore this is like a really bad pictorial representation of the phrase "red sky at night, shepherd's delight" (the 5 stars is meant to be a metaphor for delight) [156/195]

Haiti I hurt my eyes squinting at this miniaturised pic, but after close inspection you have created the most fortified and weaponised palm tree of all time [157/195]

That's right I'm now officially Twitter Verified!!! All it took was for me to insult 157 different nations. I see Lesotho recognises the greatness of the LBD (little black dress) [158/195]

The haters keep on coming. I get so many more negative private messages than positive ones, though that might be because I keep retweeting and reposting all the negative ones therefore providing perverse incentives Thailand stop tryin to be Costa Rica [159/195]

Trinidad and Tobago you've done your diagonal stripe the other way to most flags, how edgy how *alternative* or you own a mirror [160/195]

Been debating which Syrian flag to use but decided not to take sides: both are pretty shite, basically the same (especially for colourblind). I admire the opposition for trying to one-up them by adding an extra star but it's still 3 stars which is mediocre at best [161/195]

I'm glad Turkey and Tunisia have teamed up to depict Pac-Man swallowing a Pac-Dot [162-163/195]

looks like a really shitty walk of fame, Suriname [164/195]

gonna power through the boring ones left today Sudan this is the dullest thing, why did you dedicate it to the options on a roulette wheel [165/195]

South Sudan you broke away and you stuck with an equally boring flag, what a waste of independence [166/195]

wtf Palestine you aren't even related to Sudan and you are still copying their flag [167/195]

Yemen as well this is like the penultimate step before in a step-by-step guide on how to make a Sudan flag. Come on guys you are wasting good opportunities [168/195]

You know what let's just try to power through the rest this weekend Here. We. Go. Equatorial Guinea's flag does NOT look like a real flag. The tree looks like they got it off ClipArt. I'm not even sure the country's not fictional [169/195]

I was meant to go to a party tonight but I've just set my status to "maybe attending" Samoa this is ugly, uninspired, like Southern Cross we get it you're in the Southern hemisphere, but your colours are clashing and what a terrible use of space [170/195]

Vatican City we get it you have loads of money, but go easy on the bondage symbolism. The pope is filthy rich and rich in filth. [171/195]

I was going to do "10 things I hate about Uganda" but I got to the Ugandan flag and it is actually da bomb (plus 10 is too many things to come up with) Sorry guys it's brilliant. The crane is like totally IDGAF plus he's doing the opening of the James Bond intro [172/195]

Iran...I ran away from this crappy flag! PS guess who's back? ;) -H [173/195]

That's right it's me, Humbert Wendell. I managed to regain access to the twitter account by guessing Ken's password. From now on expect some more excellent puns and some of my avantgarde theories Finland? How ironic as this flag looks pretty unfinnished! -H [174/195]

Ew Jamaica... I'm actually struggling to think of a good pun on Jamaica :( och so annoying why can't I think of one, it's turning me insane! -H [175/195]

It was actually very easy to hack this account, there are several clues to his password if you take the first letter of the first 8 prime-numbered tweets. Also his secret question was "what is the name of my old intern" Tanzania you're makin' me have Tanmania! -H [176/195]

I can also reveal that I was behind the account @kenchangcomedy. 2 Those 2 days as an unpaid intern then getting fired left me a drunk shell of a human. We need to rethink how internships work, and also introduce more retainer fees A smiling cyclops -H [177/195]

But it doesn't matter now because I have a great platform to sell my book! Please check it out it has great theories like how the Grenada government took money from a rug company look the Grenada flag is their most popular rug it even has a flammable symbol on it -H [178/195]

you can see the same thing with the Turkmenistan flag, it's all a front for the rug company Grenada Rugs find out more in my book Humbert Wendell's Theories on Why Flags are Bad -H [179/195]

Of course, not all my theories are about rugs! For example look at Barbados, clearly they've been paid off by the Renew Trident Campaign for Nuclear Armament. Think about it. Who would win out the most from a nuclear war? My mind immediately goes to Barbados -H [180/195]

I have a whole chapter about Israel. If you look closely, you might find a subtle Star of David on the Israeli flag, leading me to suspect that Israel is secretly controlled by by the Jews. -H [181/195]

goes without saying that El Salvador and Nicaragua = the Illuminati -H [182 and 183/195]

I'm back. Managed to wrestle control off Humbert. Hopefully that's the last we hear from him. He caught me off-guard while I was busy collating the flags into a Twitter moment, here are the first 100: x.com/i/moments/9167… PS Azerbaijan that blue is ew [184/195]

For Canada I have done some minor edits on the Wikipedia page: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flag_of_C… [185/195]

I know a lot of people have been waiting for Canada, so I needed to make it a special one. Sorry for the wait guys

It took 4 minutes for them to remove it. But for a good 240 seconds it was the definitive historical account of how the Canadian flag came to be. en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?ti…

my contributions "did not appear constructive"

Bhutan this dragon so pale, it's definitely got a vitamin deficiency that's why it's cupping 4 oranges [186/195]

Apologies to all, I've been so busy! I've got loads of great news. Firstly, Flagmash is going well and we've started work on a spin-off, Flagmash Move! Here's a sneak peak: (Please note all art assets used in the app are completely our own) [187/195]

Yes I know it's spelt Papua New Guinea, 3 more interns were fired for this error

Next bit of news, I got this e-mail from Penguin Publishing who want to turn my flag thread into a book!! [188/195]

Also things are definitely on the up, I got my first piece of fan mail! Makes a refreshing change, everything is a-ok. ps Venezuela's flag is bad [189/195]

Nearing the end of this thread I have achieved the near-impossible. When I started this I set out to change hearts and minds but I never thought I'd change the heart and mind of Trump himself, but it has. He even took time to slag off the flag of Poland. [190/195]

HUGE ***shocking*** announcement: I am ending this thread early. It's been fun. I don't need it anymore. I am in a better place. Thanks all for following. Full explanation + South Korea below That's it folks! move along nothing to see here [191/191]

I spoke too soon. Lots of major developments below (+San Marino) [192/?]